I think the title says it all! This includes my heady ideas, my ditzy moments, and anything I feel like subjecting you to. This is my life, from Michigan, to North Carolina, to Africa, and then back again!
This is the Scorpion that Shannon and I found in our room. Very big and very scary. Guatemala also has some giant spiders, snakes that like to sleep on warm computers, and even offered us a small earthquake. While we did miss a tropical storm, a hurricane, a volcanic eruption, and flooding, we did get to witness (and thankfully escape)the beginning of a shoot out on the way to the Capital, and a crime scene complete with yellow tape and corpses. Yeah, definitely had some excitement on this trip. I was happy to be home in Flint where we have neither critters nor shootings. lol
Back in college a friend once asked me, “What’s your biggest fear?”
I remember my answer clearly. “I’m terrified that someday, I’ll be 90 years old, laying on my death bed and realize I’ve never done anything great in my life.”
Something within me way back then knew that life was meant to be something significant. And you’d think being able to articulate that at 20, that I’d be intentional about the things I’d do.
But maybe not.
I think perhaps at that age, we might all idealistically approach life that way,- That we are here for a purpose and our lives will make a difference. But like so many others, I guess I thought that an exciting life would happen to me, while I was doing the routine, mundane, daily grind. The daily college life led to the daily career life.
Before I knew it, years had slipped by and nothing great had happened to me yet. Perhaps I would just need to wait a bit longer…..
Then I had my epiphany: I was bored in life.
While I loved my friends, my family, and even my teaching job, I recognized that if life was going to be exciting, I was going to have to make it exciting. So, (much to my father’s chagrin) I sold off everything I owned, packed 4 suitcases and moved to Africa.
If you’d asked anyone around me, they would have all told you I was living this big, adventurous, life! I ran a large schooling program for AIDS orphans and vulnerable children! I slayed giant insects! I ate chicken intestines.
And while the years I lived in Africa were great and provided me (and you long-time readers) with some hilarious blog-fodder, after the initial excitement wore off, it was a new location to spend Monday thru Sunday.
Eventually I came home.
Now working and enrolled in grad school, …well, same thing, new city.
More years have passed….Early 30’s… Still nothing “great”.
So last February I read Donald Miller’s A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, and it really spoke to me. It’s the only book I’ve ever read where I thought to myself, “…damn...I should’ve bought this instead of just checking it out at the library.”
I read half, and then started again from the beginning because it was too good not to. And while I finished the end chapters, and read through the second time, I also started at the beginning again. I had to have 3 bookmarks throughout the book to keep my place for my multiple readings.
It just made sense to me.
Maybe it’s his simplicity of writing, maybe because he’s talking about things from a writer’s perspective, maybe it’s because I see myself in him when he’s “living the life he always wanted” and still recognizes something is missing, but I could relate to it.
There’s a scene when he writes about living as a writer and making up stories for a living. Then one day he goes to a coffee shop and sees a couple with a family and it occurs to him that while He’s been making up stories, others have been living their stories.
I think that’s the part I started to tear up.
I recognize now that the life I’ve been desiring to have all along is not simply about doing stuff, or even having an adventure, but an living an intentional life. Yes inevitably, it will include the daily grind, and living this way is bound to bring about some adventures, but it’s caused me to reflect on what I actually want to start doing in the midst of my Monday thru Sunday.
A few months ago Donald Miller posted the “what if” challenge on his blog. I thought to myself,” What if my character stopped saving random cats, and started to progress the story forward?”
This is what I’ve been slowly moving towards,- focused on the thing that has been heavy on my heart. “What if I actually started reaching out to some of these teenage girls in class who are slipping through the social cracks? What if I broke that unspoken rule that students and adults don’t mix? What if I started being an influence in their lives? What if I gave them the chance to live a better story?” This is the direction I’ve started as a short term story.
So I’ve been really hoping to attend the Living a Better Story seminar (with Donald Miller) in Portland in September. I’m thinking that it would give me additional encouragement to continue in the direction I’ve started to baby step. Maybe it can help me lead these teens along the way. At the same time it terrifies me. I told my best friend “I’d like to go to this seminar… but I’m afraid it will mess me up. I’m afraid I’ll be wrecked for the ordinary.”
But isn’t facing conflict the best part of the story? You’ll root for my character won’t you?
I shot this picture down the ravine. You can see that shorts are were left behind as well as shoes and toys. Just evidence of all that was washed away in the flood. These are picture of the damage done in the recent tropical storm and flooding. The edges of the river have just been destroyed, taking homes, and lives. This is the water line, 1/2 way up the window. It lets you see just how bad the flooding was in the city.
So these are some of the temporary houses we helped with to allow these families a roof over their heads. A far cry from what they will have in a year, but it is 4 walls and a rood that keeps the rain out better than black plastic.
This is Baby harrison. His mother is 16 and she was found on the banks of the river, freightened and alone. Her house and all of her belongings were washed away. They were living in a "house" made of tree branches and black plastic. So many people were living like this,- a tent city.
We spent a few days building and painting a house for this younge widow. She lost her husband in the flood, and now is living on the compound withher two small children. She's been given this house as well as employment to provide for herself, and protect her from men who might pose a threat to a younge woman.
This is Colocha, a beautiful little girl at the mal-nutrition center. She was abandoned at birth and rescued. Her name means "curly" and while she is a happy healthy baby, thriving at Hope for Life, still holding her in my arms made me cry. She is doing well, but what about all of the babies who have yet to be rescued?
The Lord has really been pushing me to ask him for "More." I'm trying, but to be honest, I don't know what "more" is. It reminds me of a story I read about Katheryn Kuhlman as a little girl. She'd stand behind her father and say "Daddy, give me a nickle." He'd pretend he didn't hear her and she'd ask again and again until he'd swoop around and pull her into his lap and give her a nickle. As an adult he recounted this story to her, and said, "My precious daughter. I would have given you anything you'd asked... you only limited yourself because you didnt'know to ask for more." I can see this in myself,- like a little kid who things $100 is the biggest amount in the world,- enought to buy a candy bar and a house and a car. But we all know there is so much more than $100! God is telling me there is more than I've been asking for, more than I've been willing to accept. I don't know what it is, but I'm asking for it!
Okay, I'm not done with the Guatemala stories, but I read this today and thought it was interesting.
1 Chron 22:7 "I wanted to build a Temple to honor the name of the Lord my God," David told him. "But the Lord said to me, 'You have killed many men in the great battles you have fought. And since you have shed so much blood before me, you will not be the one to build a Temple to honor my name. But you will have a son who will experience peace and rest. I will give him peace with his enemies in all the surrounding lands. His name will be Solomon and I will give peace and quiet to Isreal during his reign. He is the one who will build a Temple to honor my name......'"
David, was a man after God's own heart, but at the same time, God didn't want someone with a reputation as a killer to be the one to build his house of prayer,- he wanted someone with a reputation as a peacemaker.
Do you think you are building in the kingdom of God? What is your reputation?
One day this little boy approached our car when we stopped at the office. "Como se llama?" I asked "Wilmer," he responded with a crossed eyed smile. You couldn't help but love him. I gave him a stick of gum and he smiled bigger. Then he reached in the window and started rummaging through Michelle's bag, looking for candy. The next day we went on a tour of the compound and stopped by the malnutrition center. This is for children who are malnourished, or abandoned. For 6 out of 10 children it is too late by the time they arrive. too much damage has been done to their little bodies, and they don't make it. But for those who do, the transformation is amazing. Their before and after pictures are displayed in the hallway. It almost brought tears to my eyes when I saw this: Our little gum chomper had been rescued himself. I'd never had guessed if I hadn't seen the picture myself. that really just sealed in my heart the importance of the ministry that was being done in Zacapa.
This is baby Mario. He's an unbelievable 7 months old.
And here are several of our girls with babies and toddlers of various ages.
Okay Okay,now a bit about the guatemala trip....
Guatemala was a beautiful country combining my favorite parts of my favorite countries. Guatemala city reminded me a lot of Maputu, Mozambique, but Zacapa was mountainous like Swaziland. And of course the people were lovely and gracious like the Brazilians so it was a triple win!
But this trip was by far the hardest trip I've been on,- mentally, physically, emotionally. However I'm not affraid of a challenge. I know "suffering" is the place where were are tested, challenged, and grow, so I tried to take it all in with a good attitude.
The temperatures and humidity were both high and a lot of days were were working outside. In addition, our beginning living quarters were more like bunkers with community bathrooms,- and y'all know how I am with my downtime and personal space. This was fixin' to drive me crazy!
But through it all I had to keep in mind, the advice Ben Rogers gave me back in Swaziland, "A good servant isn't offended when she's treated like a servant" So many times I'll do a task and get it done, but it would never be considered serving. Serving is an attitude. Serving is excellence. Serving is Humility.
This was the question that kept rising up in my spirit.
Will you serve me? Will you serve me when you are hot?
Will you serve me when you are tired?
Will you serve me when you are sick?
Will you serve me when the task doesn't seem like 'ministry'?
Will you serve me when someone one else gets all the credit?
Will you serve me?
All of these were hard, but I know I'm better because of meeting the challenge.
I'll say it. I'll blaspheme. I know I will offend most of you. A few of you will end our friendship. Some of you might even threaten my life, or the life of my cat. But I can no longer stay silent.
I don't understand the appeal of Twilight.
I've heard women from 9 years to-50 years rave about the stories. Even a few guys.
So I thought I'd at least give it a shot. I got the first book from the library. And now after 3 weeks and 350 pages, I'm bored. It's slow, repetative, I can't quite figure out what the plot is suppose to be, and it's kinda scary. No, not vampire scary, but Edwards-gets-bored-at-night-and-watches-Bella-sleep scary. When I was in high school we called that stalking. Now it's called love.
I've heard so much about the love story, and I don't really see a love story here. I see an obsession and a struggle over self control. Some women (and I'm talking grown women here) have expressed a desire for a man, like Edward, who would give up everything, and deny themselves because they are so in love a woman.
If that's you,( and I say this 100% judgement free) then put down the Twilight series, and pick up your Bibles. Read Hosea, read John. The love story is true, better, and has a happier ending. :0) Now don't get me wrong, I'm not one those nay-sayers who think books like these are evil and will destroy our civilization. Maybe it can even be of some good if it helps you to recognize an unfulfilled longing within yourself. I hope you all find what you're looking for, I do.
But I think the problem is that women read books like these, or watch chick flicks and beleive that people like this exist (I'm talking about romantics not vampires) and that if they could only meet him then their lives would be happy.
But they never pursuit the one relationship that can truely make them happy. And that's why these twi-hards make me so sad.
