Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Genie in a Bottle


Aladdin had the lamp, Darren had Samantha, Captain/ Major Nelson had Jeannie. It seems wish granting is the popular thing to do! What ever your heart desires…Poof! Why can't Christians have that?

Now don't get me wrong, I understand that God is not Santa Claus- give him your wish list and He'll take care of it. But lately I've been struggling with the "Why" when God doesn't respond to my prayers.

I understand that I won't get everything I want simply because I pray for it. God has much greater vision than I do. Jesus asked, "What father would give his child a snake when he asks for a fish?" (Matt 7:10) So if something will harm me in the long run, God is kind enough not to give it to me just because I ask for it.
But what I'm describing are things that I know God wants for me to have. When I pray for humility, why do I still stumble over my own stupid pride? When I'm praying for a new ministry opportunity to serve and glorify him, why am I still sitting here with no direction? If these are good, and righteous things that God loves, and desires us to have, why doesn't He give them to us when we finally know enough to ask for them?

I think the most satisfying answers have come through reflecting on my past experience with God during my quiet time. In the past I've prayed for something only to receive it much later than I'd expected. But upon further investigation, I could see how God had arranged circumstances and put things into place so that I could have my prayers answered. Perhaps now, while I think He is sitting quietly, He is actually hard at work putting all of the pieces into place.

And sometimes this slow delivery is for my own good. For example, when I was in college I was overweight because of an unhealthy relationship with food. I used to it for comfort, to celebrate, during lonely times, - essentially I was turning to food for all of the things I should have been turning to God for. And as God began to show me this wrong attitude (dare I say a form of idolatry?) I was able to turn my heart to Him once again.

Over the months I struggled daily but eventually came to a place food has been put into its proper place. But because I struggled daily and because I was determined "run the race through" I now feel confident that I will never go back. Hard work, struggle, continued longing, and determination all helped me to "own" the results, and prevent me from slipping into the same behaviors again.
Realizing this I'm still praying for my good things to come, - but I've changed my prayers a bit. I'm confident that He has already heard me, and knows my needs, but continue to pray for His good things to come. And I've substituted my "Why God?" prayers, by boldly thanking Him for already setting the wheels in motion, - it's simply a matter of time now.

Jesus encourages us, "Keep looking and you will find. Keep on knocking and the door will be opened… If sinful people know how to give good gifts…how much more will your heavenly father give good gifts to those who ask." (Matt 7)
It's like my friend always tells me: We pray in our time, God answers in his!

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Stramazon River


This week on Wednesday my class was wide open! Perhaps it was the full-moon, perhaps they'd been so great on Monday and Tuesday they had a naughty quota to fill. Not sure, but regardless of the reason they were borderline crazy.
On that particular day my guided reading groups were very challenging. One little girl was attempting to read imaginary words floating in the air, and then seemed puzzled when I asked her to look at the page.

Anyway while reading a book about rivers we came across the word "stream". Bronson, an extremely bright student, decided the word was "Amazon River." I tried to prompt him to try again saying, "No Bronson, look. This word begins with the letters S-T-R" and made the sound /str/ to demonstrate how it should sound. "Now you try it. Make it sound like /str/. " He excitedly looked at the page and shouted, "Str- Str- Stramazon river!!!!!"

It's fine, have a chuckle at my expense. It happens in 1st grade. Students get an idea so ingrained in their mind that no amount of prompting can re-direct them. They are set on one path and are incapable of coming up with alternatives. That made me begin the think… How many times have I been so set in my own thinking, that I wouldn't allow God to redirect me. Have I ever closed God's doors because of my unwillingness to see things in an alternative way?

As many of you know a recent trip to VA [Jan 2005] pushed me way out of my comfort zone. I guess I was so panicky because God was leading me in a direction I had never considered before. I'd had my own life agenda and he was asking me to see it in a different way. The word I'd been reading as "stramazon river" was so clearly "streams."
Lately I've been relying heavily on Proverbs 3:5:
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will direct your paths.

I felt the need to share this because so many of us are in a season of transition and new direction! Perhaps you can not only get a laugh from this story but can also learn what I've learned.

Swaziland...Here I come!


The strange thing is, I'd counted it for lost. I applied with Children's Cup back in February hoping for a 2 week missions trip this summer. But as I learned more about their organization, and about the children of Swaziland my little spark was fanned into a big giant roaring fire. I felt without a doubt that I needed to be there working along side of them. These children have been born with so little and yet have still lost so much. I feel an undeniable love for them and want the opportunity to help them.

Well after 4 silent months I'd decided they must not want me. I hadn't heard a thing. And then... I recieved an email from Children's Cup. Last night as I lay on the couch I felt God's prompting- "Go email them!" I felt he showed me the words to write so I did. It was short and sweet and sent through cyber space in a matter of 3 minutes. I didn't expect to hear a reply until after the Memorial Day weekend, yet there it was in my mailbox this morning. Written at 1:30 am:

Great timing.
Tomorrow we have our last meeting with the Swazi staff here in Louisiana.
We'll be happy for you to visit Swaziland. The first opening will be in February of 2006. Will this fit your schedule?
We are seeing tremendous growth of the program in Swaziland and believe you will be blessed by what you see and experience.
Dave & Jean Ohlerking


Notice the greeting: Great timing

Yes, I guess when I "wait upon the Lord" I do end up with great timing. I'm not really sure how this will all turn out but I know one thing,- Swaziland... here I come!