10 things I won't miss about Africa

10. Being asked “Are you hungry?” every time I yawn.
9. Insects. No one needs to start their day killing mega-spiders, cockroaches, 7- inch centipedes, ants, beetles, or bird-sized moths.
8. Spending every day acutely aware that I’m white. Receiving special treatment because I’m white. Being discriminated against because I’m white. Being ignored because I’m white. Receiving respect because I’m white. Having beggars harass me because I’m white. Having people try to be my friend because I’m white. Having people expecting me to solve all of their problems because I’m white.
It’s annoying.
7. Buying my groceries in shifts. Susan says if you can get 80% of your list at one store, it’s been a good day.
6. Sun shining into my bedroom at 4:30 am.
5. Sweating in all of my crevices.
4. African toilet paper. The best stuff here is okay. But sometimes you encounter the 1-ply see-through stuff. It’s just no good.
3. Public holidays being declared at a moments notice. Schools being closed at a moments notice. Schools being delayed for the King’s Birthday… no wonder the educations system here is so poor. No one ever goes to school!
2. My teeny-tiny refrigerator. C’mon I can’t even stand up a 2 liter on the top shelf! I have a house, but it feels like a college dorm with this tiny fridge!
1. Instant coffee. You remember the crap our parents drank when we were growing up in the 80’s? The Folgers instant crystals? Yeah, the stuff that made me refuse to drink coffee until I was 27? That’s what they serve here. (I guess if you are a tea drinking culture, who cares if your coffee is crap.) I’ve had to learn which restaurants serve “filter coffee” and I frequent them often.

Needless to say, I’m looking forward to America, the land of the free (refills) where there will be rivers of filter coffee flowing every day! The appliances will be bigger than me, we practice day light savings, the toilet paper is like little square pillows on your bum, and there are so many white people, you just blend in. You know my good experiences her in Africa far outweigh the bad, but since I’m going I’m happy to say good-bye to these 10 annoying things! :0)