funny/ sad

Funny conversations I’ve had with Swazis”
“I want to go to America someday. I will have to learn to eat your food. I know Americans like to eat crab.”
“Oh yes.” I said. “You should go to New York City, and eat pizza and hot dogs.”
“Dogs?????!!!!!!”

“How long will this team of American women be here in Swaziland?”
“10 days.”
“10 days?! Oh Christy, that is too long! They will go home and find their husband has taken a 2nd wife!”

“Hey ladies, I was listening to a report on the radio about the country that has the highest education system in the world. Can you guess what country it’s in?”
“Swaziland?”
“nope.”
“The United States?”
“Nope. Guess again. I’ll give you a hint,-it’s in Europe.”
“…Mexico?”

“I don’t like teen agers, they’re too wild. But I love little kids. They are so cute, they are just like wheel barrels.”
“Wheel barrels?”
“Yes, you just put them there. And when you come back they are still sitting there waiting for you.”

Sad conversations I’ve had with Swazis:
“You know Christy, this HIV is a real problem. And the men… you might be married and your husband will go and get another wife in secret. Or maybe he has a girlfriend. You won’t know.
If your husband doesn’t come home one night, - you don’t ask. A good Swazi wife can never ask where he has been… I go every year to get tested. I want to know.”


“Yes, Christy, it’s true. If a man doesn’t come home, you can’t ask. If the man wants to come home to you and dish, then you just serve him some food.
“I don’t think I would want to ask. I’d be so angry I’d want to kill him. But if you fight him about another woman he will just say, ‘Ah, why are you being so impatient. This thing will pass. You must be patient.’…
“That’s just the way Swazi men are. If you tried to leave…eish! He won’t accept it. He will just beat you severely, or maybe kill you. He won’t accept a woman leaving… I think that maybe, when I get married, I will just want to have a son. And then, after I have my son, if [my husband] wants to leave, I won’t fight him, - I’ll just let him go. He won’t have to come back. And I can have my son.”